PABLO’S WORLD OF HAPPINESS

THERE ARE SOME things that are so amusing that thinking about them makes my boredom disappear like UMEME (if you not Uganda Airlines). You can find a headline in the news: “Joseph Kony Arrested” and in the details you find “Joseph Kony arrested 3 people who were trespassing in his Rwikwamba Kisalasalo camp”. Then “Mrs. Jannet Museveni Expecting”. And the news in details: “Mrs. Jannet Museveni is expecting visitors from Japan…”

There is something I find interesting about abbreviations and acronyms. Think of DRARU (Dangerous Relationships Are Rarely Understood), or UMEME (Uganda Muffe Enzikiza Muffe Enzikiza)! Beware using abbreviations could land you into trouble. You will go to a place asking for the GM and the Gate Man will show up! No wonder most of us are VIPs (Very Improved Peasants).

Then there are things in life you can never be sure of. For instance I always want to hear the prayer requests from coffin-sellers. Recently I found a man eating chicken and mangoes at the same time. I couldn't tell what was accompanying the other. And then there was a toothless mzee struggling with mulokoni (cow hoof) to get out the bone marrow. For a moment I thought he had invented a flute!

My nephew Douglas recently told me that babies are the best swimmers because they do it in a basin. I grew up knowing my heart was in my head. Every time I did something wrong, my mum would pat me on the head and say, “Take heart”. My niece Rhoda once told me that Dentists are the most respected people; they make you shut up and open your mouth. And when I think of the road sign I read recently, I decide to end the article. It read, “Go. Slow men at work!”

Yours in laughter – Kenneth Kimuli Pablo

ZEBIDAYO’S ESCAPADES - MY FIRST LOVE

My First Love
By Denis Agaba aka Skido

MY FIRST LOVEMY ROAD TO maturity was rough. During my childhood I had no peers in my age bracket. So I was forced to skip and fit into my elder brother’s group. These dudes could do anything to capture a lady's attention. I remember Davis eating live fire to impress a chic, who had doubted his ability to do it. Damn! That scar will never cease to stand out on his lips. My elder brother and his gangs were the Casanovas in our village. They were good in class and physically appealing – all the village girls dreamt about them. It's approaching Christmas time and I must make a pass on some mushrooming village belle of my age. Nkazi is what everyone calls her. She has just started developing her feminine physic and seemingly, she's the gang's next target. Gosh! I have to pull up my stunts, lest I lose out.

I sat down and wrote her the following letter:

Dear tomato source of my chips Nkazi!

I instigate this navigation amidst a mist of happiness and joy. I’m really capitulated by your beauty. Every time I see you, my heart skips a beat and my body gets paused for 30 seconds. If they wanted a specimen for beauty, a world war would re-occur as America and European powers scramble for you just like they did for Africa. If all girls were to be blind, at least you would be one-eyed. A camera does not need a flash while taking your photo as you are a flash yourself. God really took his time to shape you. You are complete and all you need to be perfect is ME, not any other boy. When I enter my bed and put off the candle, it’s only you I see dancing Kinyarwanda at the ceiling.

I will love you until Museveni grows dreadlocks; until Sebagala stops using “Concept” in his speeches; until Uganda’s roads part with potholes; and until CHOGM comes back to Uganda. As I shade this blue blood on this gracious piece of paper I stole from my mother, my heart is dancing calypso, my lungs are clapping with joy, and my intestines are perambulating with joy. I want to meet you and tell you more.

Yours in love,Zebidayo Dedz:

1. Dreams by Maria Kale

2. Tindatiine by Lede Mariyam

3. And of da Lod by Boys through Men

After scribbling the above letter, my sister's baby powder could not survive me. I poured some of it in the envelop and sealed it. "Now, how do I deliver the letter to her?" I wondered! I did not want anyone to know because if at all I failed to access her and the gang got to know, I would suffer the scorn. I decided to deliver it myself. It's Christmas vigil and the mass starts at 10pm; luckily enough, reliable sources say Nkazi is attending. I pocket the letter and run to her home. I decide to hide behind a maize granary next to the fence, just to wait for Nkazi and her family to start the journey to Church so I could follow along.

As I persevere the painful mosquito bites, Nkazi's mum opens the door with a basin in her hands and walks towards my direction. She swung the basin with the dirty water she's just used to wash her feet and suddenly, there I was wet in my favorite white school Uniform shirt. Oh! My Gosh! I couldn't move to avoid raising suspicions of a thief in the home. ‘Star tafa!" I convince myself. Meanwhile, Nkazi's young brother opens the door and also heads my direction. Bambi the ka stupid boy opens his zip and starts to pee all over my head! I persevered and ‘died’ like a man till the end.

By the time the boy went back, Nkazi and the rest were all outside ready to walk to Church. They locked the house, moved and I was left behind, just like a pig, all in the name of LOVE! I ended up not delivering the letter. Neither did I attend the vigil mass. I lost a tear or two, but the worst thing happened the next day when I met Nkazi with one of the boys in the gang. He had bought her a soda and they were drinking it together hand in hand celebrating the birth of Christ! If you were the one, what would you have done?

YOU CAN SUCCEED FROM ANYWHERE

By Robert Bake Tumuhaise


BAKE, for the last 10 years I’ve been chasing a UK Visa in vain. I have prayed and fasted but God has forsaken me. Now I know I am going to die a poor man,” my friend recently lamented. I was about to tell him not to be foolish, but I did not because I realized he was simply a victim of a crippling mindset. No wonder Saint Paul urges us to be transformed by renewing our minds daily.

This young man is just one of the many captives that have postponed living and are languishing in self-created limbo, waiting to start enjoying life when their dream of going abroad comes true.
It’s funny how some people struggle to leave a country that others are struggling to enter. While you may struggle to go to India to make money, hundreds of Indians entering Uganda are prospering!

When Winston Churchill thought of calling our motherland the Pearl of Africa, he had seen many treasures in this land.

How did the Bitatures, the Wavas, the Mukwanos make their money? And how many Ugandans have returned from South Africa, America, UK, without even enough money for a ticket back?
The belief that you can only succeed from abroad is part of a poverty/failure mindset that must be overcome.

I have a strong conviction that a person prepared to succeed will always succeed anywhere in the world. I remember reading about a man who was once a millionaire. All his factories were destroyed during war and he fled to another country as a refugee without anything. However, within two years, he was a millionaire again! This implies that his success was in his mind.

God has given each of us talents and gifts which, if used creatively and according to his purpose, will inevitably lead us to success. In this world there are people who wait for things to happen and there are those who make things happen. I am among the latter. How about you?


The writer is an author & Managing Director of World of Inspiration.
Contact: bakerobert@yahoo.com / 0712-868424

ALWAYS STAND FOR YOUR WORDS

By Robert Bake

There was a Reverend who had publicly confessed that he had left alcohol. Then one day, a thirsty man found him sipping from a bottle of ‘mineral water’, forcefully grabbed the bottle and took a sip. Spitting it out the man screamed: “Reverend, how come you your water is bitter?” “You mean it’s bitter?”, answered the Reverend “Praise Jesus! He has done it again; I mean what he did at Cana”! The Reverend had failed the test of standing for his words when he declared he had quit boozing.

If I am not being betrayed by my memory, the greatest thing that always caused rage at home during my childhood days was when someone promised to bring me something or to take me somewhere and didn’t deliver. No matter how small the promise was, not fulfilling it always eroded trust and confidence in such a person.

It is not uncommon for us to promise and not fulfil, a thing that has become normal behaviour for some people. People promise jobs, assistance, friendship, e.t.c, only to be seen nowhere when time to deliver comes. People will promise to be there for you only to forget (or at least pretend they forgot) their promise when stormy days come. We have seen many couples publicly promising each other to stay together for better for worse, till death do them part, only to see infidelity, alcohol, witchcraft, greed, arrogance, money, and so on, part them.

As Christians it’s important to stand for our words. When you propose marriage to someone, or accept someone’s marriage proposal, you are bound by your words, so you won’t have ground to propose or accept a second proposal until the first one has been cancelled. There is an African proverb that while a donkey is tied by the rope, a man is tied by his words. Politicians, as well, won’t escape this reality – accountability for our words – especially as we near 2011. A politician will say something and when the media quotes the exact words, even using vocal recordings as evidence, he/she still gets the audacity to say “I was misquoted”! Saying what we mean and meaning what we say is part of our social responsibility as human beings.

Bake is an author,
& Managing Director, World of Inspiration.

SILENCE VITAL FOR EVERY BELIEVER

By Robert Bake Tumuhaise

I have no doubt the time I spent upcountry during the festive season revived my life. One of the things I enjoyed a great deal was freedom from noise. I was in a village with no telecom network, no internet, no discos, no batembeyi, and not many vehicles. The calm I felt gave me an atmosphere to evaluate my life in 2009 and to plan better for 2010. The peace I got reminded me what a gift silence can be! From the first century saints, through the ascetics of the middle ages, to the most recent saints of Padre Pio’s time, “Quiet Time” has been part of the life-style of the great men and women of God.

As you well know, today we are living in a world of noise. There are too many voices fighting for our attention at ago. While the street preacher is still assuring you of how you are soon perishing in hell, the mutembeyi will be shouting at the top of his voice to make you see his clothes. You will be fleeing from the hooting taxi, only to bump into a noisy truck marketing music. Even at places of work and at home, there will always be someone to shout at you. In the end you may never have a settled mind, unless you take a deliberate decision to withdraw from noise once in a while.

Each one of us needs to create some personal time. This is something I emphasize in my book "TOUCHING HEAVEN, RAZING HELL!" You need some uninterrupted time for yourself, if possible everyday. This is what I call "Me-Alone-Time". A time to reflect on your achievements, failures, weaknesses and strengths. A time to evaluate your past, meditate on the present and plan your future. A moment to take unrushed decisions for the good of your spiritual, marital or work life. Don’t say you have no time for silence; you have exactly the same number of hours in a day like the Pope and yet he gets time off his busy schedule to reflect on his life. 2010 is not a year of excuses; it’s a year of action.

Bake is an author, and Managing Director,
World of Inspiration.
Contact: worldofinspirationuganda@gmail.com

EVERY WORD WE SAY IS A SEED

By Robert bake Tumuhaise

Ever met someone who’s totally negative about everything they do? Very unfortunate, but some people seem to find sympathy in saying negative things about themselves. They find some kind of relief in telling others how they are poor, how they are failing at work, how their spouses are cheating on them, how ugly their appearance is, and so on. The only thing they don’t seem to realize is that there is power in their tongue. Every word you say is a seed, and in due course you’ll reap it’s fruits – whether tasty or sour.

Do you know your words can build or destroy, make or break you? No wonder the bible says the power of life and death lies on the tongue! Normally sadness engulfs my heart whenever I hear someone confess negatively of themselves: “I don’t think I can make it in business…I am talentless…Success is not for me because I was born from a poor family…I am simply going for that interview but I can’t get the job…No man wants to propose marriage to me…No matter how much I try people don’t like me…blab la bla”.

Allow me share with you this tip from my book “TAPPING GOD’S BLESSINGS: Keys to Open Doors of Success in your Life”. If you do not develop the habit of prophesying good news into your life, no one will do it for you. To achieve success we must tame our tongues to confess positively everyday: “I was created to impact lives…There’s nothing I can lay my hands on and it fails…Despite my weaknesses I will make it in life…I am beautiful/handsome…I have what it takes to create wealth...”. Otherwise saying negative things about yourself will always bring you some consolation, but they will never solve your problems.

Bake is an author,

and Managing Director,

WORLD OF INSPIRATION.

EXCITEMENT AT THE 7TH AUTHORS' FORUM IN KAMPALA

By Robert Bake Tumuhaise

This is to introduce to you the Authors' Forum blog through which we shall keep updating you on whatever transpires at the Authors' Forum - the leading inspirational event in Uganda. The forum gathers every 1st Wednesday of the month, 5:15pm at National Theatre, in Kampala. Last Wednesday was the 7th episode of the forum and here are highlights of what took place.
For those who attended this episode, the beauty of the event must be still fresh in your mind. "My life has totally been transformed to the extent that I now feel a new creature", confessed Martha who gave me a phone call later that day. Similar compliments expressing how the participants were blessed by the event have continued to flow in. For those who missed, I must confess it's practically impossible to give you a feeling of what transpired, but I will try.

The forum began with humorous Pablo interviewing two powerful women - Musarait Kashmiri (from Maisha Film Foundation) and Joy Doreen Biira (from NBS TV & Capital FM). "If we don not tell our stories,no one else will", contended Musarait. She said Uganda is a goldmine of talent and life-changing stories, which if exploited would make Uganda one of the best powerhouses in the world in as far as art and creativity is concerned. Then came Biira, who proved what a witty woman she is. Having climbed to the top of the media game at a tender age, she attributed her success to the fact that she follows her dreams to the dot. She does not insist on doing what she studied, but rather what she enjoys and which she feels blesses society. The two women challenged the participants not to die with any unutilized talent - If you feel you want to write a book go ahead; If your dream is to act do so; If you want to become a media person act now; if you want to open a business what are you waiting for? Don't reach your deathbed and say: "Oh, I wish I had done such and such a thing", for it will be too late.

Then after exciting interludes marked by hilarious comedy from Dr. Kizito Makanga and an exciting poem by Sam Johnson Semaganda, there came the man Dr. Ian Clerk. He redefined success to mean achieving anything that gives you satisfaction while at the same time impacting lives positively. He attributed his success to the spirit of not getting satisfied with small achievements (which he referred to as a 'restless' spirit). Every time he achieves something, he gets a greater urge to pursue bigger things. An emotional sensation swept over the audience when Clerk narrated how he has survived cancer 2 times and how this has positively impacted the way he does things. "If cancer had hit me 10 years earlier than it did, I'd not be standing before you today. And this has taught me that I am not here forever. For that reason I maximize the 'now' so that I can achieve all I can in the shortest possible time", he said. The gist of the matter came in the tips he gave to help us succeed against all odds. If you want those, please contact us for a DVD (which is at 15k).

The event climaxed with Florence Rukundo driving the crowd wild with her Rufumbira hit song "Urukundo Rw'Imana" (God's Love). Now, mark 5th May (5:15pm) in your diary so that you will not miss the next episode of the Authors' Forum. We have planned an exiting line-up for you on that day. We are also glad to announce that the next issue of WORLD OF INSPIRATION Authors' Magazine is in full colour and on grossy paper! Those who have subscribed to the forum and those who will procure their tickets at least 3 days to the event will continue to get a free copy of the magazine, while the rest will buy a copy at 5,000/=. Remember you can advertise your products/services in the magazine at a cost as low as 50,000/= or 100,000/= (so long as you get to us by 18th April). To advertise in the magazine, to subscribe for the next Authors' Forum, or t reserve your ticket contact worldofinspirationuganda@gmail.com / 0712868424.
Stay in the world of inspiration!

The writer is an Inspirational Author

And Managing Director of World of Inspiration

THE PEARL OF AFRICA TO SHINE AGAIN

By Robert Bake Tumuhaise

WHOEVER chose Uganda’s motto must have drawn a picture of a country where there is peace, morality, freedom and prosperity for everyone. He/she must have imagined families flourishing without HIV/AIDS, divorce, infidelity, poverty and disease.This must have been what Winston Churchill had in mind when he thought of naming our motherland “The Pearl of Africa”. Our forefathers couldn’t have imagined that, half a century after independence, Uganda could go through the violence we experienced a few months ago. They did not know Uganda would suffer this magnitude of child sacrifice. Little did they know Uganda would earn herself the first position among alcohol-consuming countries in the world! “For God and my country!” Beautiful words. Unfortunately, it’s as if God is only living on the motto, rather than in the hearts of Ugandans.

Eighty per cent of the population in Uganda is Christian, but where’s Christ in their thoughts, beliefs and actions? I feel the biggest tragedy is that our families have lost their values. Parents have left the role of parenting to house helps and the TV. Children grow up thinking that it’s acceptable to dress indecently, use obscene words, use violence to achieve anything, or make a ‘difference’ on every transaction.But not all is lost; we can still change this trend. This is a true test of our faith in Jesus. If we really believe in a saviour, then let people see a difference in our offices, homes, schools, churches, companies, streets and everything we say or do. I feel that we can be the generation to cause the desired change. We can transfer God from our national motto to our hearts. We can stand up and say no to corruption, tribalism, immorality and violence. We can choose to embrace peace, love and reconciliation. We can be the generation to break the absurd cycle of fruitless riots.

May peace start to flood every soul like streams and freedom saturate every heart like the air we breathe. Let tribalism and sectarianism be in the past tense. Goodbye immorality. Farewell bad politics. This nation has to return to the reign of God so that its children begin to sing songs of joy and all its citizens the hymns of triumph. For God and my Country!

The writer is a Christian Inspirational Author

and Managing Director of World of Inspiration